Abortion is a complex issue. Unfortunately it is often related to women's freedom. I see this as somewhat insulting. I have had an abortion, and both before and after the procedure, I felt anything but liberated as a woman. I did have the freedom of choice to end my pregnancy, but two years later I still feel that if I had the ultimate freedom, I would now be the mother of an eighteen month old child.

My pregnancy was terminated at ten weeks and one day. My very close friend gave birth to a beautiful baby boy on the same day. This is a constant reminder of what I could have had. My baby would probably not have had the beautiful life that my friend's son has, due to my circumstances at the time. My freedom to have a child raised in a safe and loving environment was not there. The father already had a deep resentment for the embryo and I was a slave to love. This love was for a man who loved me, but showed it through possessiveness and aggression. His ultimatum was clear; have the child and I will have nothing to do with you or it. My mother at the same time was admitted to hospital with a life threatening illness. I had no job, didn't know myself, and had no prospective future. No child deserves to be born to a mother that feels no self worth, a father who resents it and an extended family who is ill. Because of these circumstances, this child would never be.

Some people argue that an abortion is an "easy" way out of an unwanted pregnancy. These people have probably never experienced an abortion. An abortion is a medical procedure. It is over within a few minutes, but the reality of what has been done stays around for much, much longer. I had complications, where my cervix would not naturally close, so I bled profusely until I was taken back to the clinic and an artificial hormone administered to finalise the birthing process. When I was back in the bed, I could hear a young girl's voice next to me, crying and confused. An older man was overpowering and chastising her. If I had the strength I would have decked him. It was clear that her abortion was through little freedom of choice on her behalf.

Humans have a biological urge to procreate. Sex is seen and psychologically assessed as a basic need for human kind (Abraham Maslow). Without it we function poorly. We are also encouraged to be career orientated, marry and have children at an older age. Due to this fact, we can have super human abstinence, or have sex the way nature intended. Accidents happen, and despite extensive birth control methods, women still fall pregnant. Biologically I was ready for children at the the age of twelve. Mentally I am still not ready at the age of twenty-one. Our physical urges versus our mental capabilities deny us our freedom of choice. Whilst I will never have an abortion again, I know that if I fell pregnant today I would need to grow up fast to handle it mentally, sacrificing a lot of freedom along the way.

Angela Nagle